Our gifts are for more than the walls of the church

Ministry is not limited to those preaching from the pulpit on Sunday mornings. As a church body, some have forgotten we all have unique, God-given gifts that are meant for much more than the walls of a church building. I did. I have been in full time ministry for nearly 16 years and it took me 14 to figure out that ministry is my call and the Army my current assignment. Our gifts are meant for where we work, where we shop, where we sleep every night, and anywhere we walk in the world around us.

This morning’s departure was filled with a wave of emotions. The usual sadness associated with leaving loved ones for an extended period of time was paired with a great sense of anticipation as we took a step of faith and obedience to God’s current assignment. After Danielle and I hugged and kissed one last time for the next five months, we prayed together again. There was such an overwhelming sense of peace as I prayed for my family and covered them in prayer, said “see you soon,” and walked to the formation to prepare to board the bus for the airport.

This deployment already feels very different than any of the other five. With a 0230 wake up, you would think fatigue would be the overwhelming feeling. But unexpectedly, peace and joy overcame me as she Chaplain invited the interested Soldiers from the 200+ flight to a brief Chapel service in the next room.  I heard the Lord say, “Bring the oil.” So, I did.

I introduced myself to the Chaplain and let him know if he was interested at the end of the service, I would like to come along side of him and anoint those that are interested prior to our departure. As he spoke on Psalms 37:4, I kept hearing the Lord bring the story of King Jehosophat in 2 Chronicles 20 to my spirit-a word given to my wife, Danielle months ago.

“After consulting the people, the king appointed singers to walk ahead of the army, singing to the Lord and praising him for his holy splendor. ‘Give thanks to the Lord; his faithful love endures forever!’”[1]In verses 22 through 24 we find the enemy armies turned against and destroyed each other in mass confusion! “Then all the men returned to Jerusalem, with Jehosophat leading them, overjoyed that the Lord had given them victory over their enemies. They marched into Jerusalem to the music of harps, lyres, and trumpets, and they proceeded to the Temple of the Lord…So Jehosophat’s kingdom was at peace, for his God had given him rest on every side.”[2]

God sent the worshippers in front of the Army. This was an unconventional approach to combat, but we see God using it here and with Joshua at the battle of Jericho. After an incredible time of communion, the Chaplain and I began to pray for the believers, over 50 in attendance. Many came forward for anointing and the Holy Spirit gave me a different word for each person. It was a powerful time of worship! As Pastor Landon Schott says, “we do not make room for the Holy Spirit, we give Him the room.” He was there.

As I begin this assignment, I have never been more convinced of the importance of being faithful where we are planted with excellence, using our God-given spiritual gifts to further His kingdom in the world around us, and showing the love of Christ through obedience to His calling. In a message from May 19th, Pastor Waylon Sears said, “87% of church-goers have a spiritual gift and don’t know how to use it. When we are not using our spiritual gifts, not only do we miss out, the world misses out. ”[3]

Our spiritual gifts are not just for the walls of the church building-they are for the lost in the world around us. We have a responsibility to develop those gifts through daily surrender and growth in our quiet times, discipleship and being planted locally with fellow believers. As believers in whatever ministry we are currently assigned-vocational ministry, military, business, teaching, barista, home-maker, coach etc.-we are called to point others to the Cross of Jesus Christ by utilizing our spiritual gifts and serving faithfully with excellence, showing the love of Christ in our word and actions.



The views presented above are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of DoD or its components.

© Copyright 2019 M.C.Wingate. All Rights Reserved.


[1]Holy Bible, 2 Chronicles 20:21, NLT, copyright 1996, 2004, 2007, 2015 Tyndle House Foundation.

[2]Holy Bible, 2 Chronicles 20:27-30, NLT, copyright 1996, 2004, 2007, 2015 Tyndle House Foundation.

[3]“Beginner’s Guide to the Apocalypse,” Sermon dated 19 May 2019, Victory Worship Center, Tucson, AZ


How to become a better fan in the Big 12

With the Big 12 conference going 7-3 in opening weekend, the kickoff to the college football season was overall a pretty solid showing for the Big 12. However, with those wins mostly against FCS competition, we really have not learned much about the strength of the conference. One thing we did learn is how much our fans have to learn about college football as a whole in the College Football Playoff (CFP) era.

Despite the early season annual prop-in-pimp in the rankings by ESPN, the Tom Herman-led Longhorn-era began with a loud thud against ACC team Maryland. Matt Rhule’s first game with Baylor did not fare much better as an FCS school, Liberty University of the Big South Conference, came into McLane Stadium and put up 585 yards of offense on a team rebuilding in the wake of the Art Briles’ saga and strutted away with a victory. West Virginia looked solid against Virginia Tech but couldn’t find the defense it needed to stop Virginia Tech down the stretch, nor the offense to drive home the tying score with less than a minute left.

As a TCU grad, two of my three favorite games every season are against the Longhorns and Bears. This goes back to the Southwest Conference (SWC) struggles and journey TCU traveled from a mid-major program to a strong member of the Big 12. As with any former rival, Texas A&M’s 34–point collapse against UCLA brought me joy. Not so with the loss of the Longhorns and the Bears. The Aggies are not in the Big 12 and their failure does not directly or indirectly impact TCU’s journey towards the National Championship. The Aggies’ loss doesn’t impact the image of the Big 12 conference, rather the image of the SEC. The Longhorns’ and Bears’ loss does.

In a perfect college football world, every team in the Big 12 would win every game on their schedule but TCU. All Big 12 fans should feel the same way about their respective teams. When Big 12 fans cheer for the failure of their conference foes during non-conference games or bowl season no matter how much we dislike them is counterproductive to the goal of a national championship. Every game counts. Every non-conference loss by a Big 12 team hurts the image of the conference in the eyes of the fans that pay attention to the media, the eyes of the media that drive the narrative, and ultimately the decision makers in at the CFP Committee. The overall process of the semi-subjective nature of the CFP Committee does not allow for much failure during non-conference play. It does not allow for more than a loss or two during conference play. Both speak to the overall strength of the team and the conference in the eyes of the media and ultimately the CFP Committee.

Anyone who pays attention to the CFP knows the importance of “the eye test” to the committee and their hand, ESPN. If a highly ranked team beats everyone on their schedule and at the end of the year everyone on their schedule has one loss, the playoff committee would have no reason to exclude that team as long as they “pass the eye test.” The eye test is terminology ESPN coined during the inception of the CFP Playoff to justify schools like TCU dropping three spots to #6 out of playoff contention despite beating Iowa State with Ohio State taking the #4 spot in 2014, and Ohio State earning the spot over Penn State last year despite not winning the Big 10 Conference and losing the head-to-head match to the Nittany Lions.

If TCU (#Go Frogs!) beats UT and Baylor later this year, their victory looks that much more insignificant in the eyes of the playoff committee as a result of their early season loss. That isn’t to say both teams can’t rebound from their early season bump. But even if UT and Baylor go undefeated between now and then and finish with one loss, most would rather their team beat an undefeated UT and Baylor team. Both having only one loss by season’s end is unlikely. But the point remains the same: Victories over teams with better records at the end of the year helps catapult the victor into the CFP, (see Ohio State 2014 and 2017 season). So why did the majority of the Big 12 fans cheer for the failure of Texas and Baylor during opening weekend? That mentality during non-conference play is counterproductive to unity of purpose and any Big 12 team’s journey to the national championship and it needs to change.

A few suggestions going forward for the Big 12 Conference and their fans:

  1. Take a lesson from the SEC. The SEC consistently markets the entire strength and unity of the conference and the media and the SEC fans consistently buy into the narrative despite the SEC only having Alabama and maybe one (LSU?) or two (Georgia?) flagship teams year after year. After the #4 LSU vs. $3 Oregon Cowboys Classic at Jerry World to kick off the 2011 college football season, the Tigers won 40-27. As the final minutes of the game came to a close, the 87,000+ predominantly LSU-clad fans didn’t chant “LSU! LSU! LSU!” They chanted, “SEC! SEC! SEC!” That’s the power of marketing and product placement and more importantly, unity. Each conference school needs to market the Big 12 as much as they market their respective schools. I can only speak for TCU and Baylor home games and TCU does this well.
  2. As the strength of the conference emerges as the year goes along, cheer for those teams in addition to your team. Those are the teams that give us the best chance to make the CFP. The SEC, Big 10 and ACC each have one championship in the first three years of the Playoff. It is the Big 12’s turn. This year, it will probably come down to Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Kansas State or TCU. Cheer for an undefeated non-conference schedule and bowl season for every Big 12 team. If every Big 12 team goes undefeated going into conference play, most would start their season 4-0. That’s two wins away from bowl eligibility.
  3. Let go of the pre-playoff mindset. It’s a new era in college football and the Big 12 teams, outside of Oklahoma and Texas, very little room for error if they hope to win a National Championship. The eye test is directly related to wins and wins over teams with wins. Admission to the CFP is indirectly (at least publicly) related to the strength of the portfolio the team brings to the table (i.e. value of the program, how the team travels, licensing, ticket sales, attendance, etc). However, all those factors are minimized with an undefeated or one-loss team that controls what they can (see University of Washington 2016).

We will learn a little more about the strength of this year’s Big 12 in week two. With Oklahoma traveling to the Horseshoe to play Ohio State, and TCU playing Arkansas in Fayetteville, those are the only two statement games for the conference this coming week. At the end of the day, a team controls its own destiny. Texas has a chance to rebound in week three against USC and Texas Tech against the Sun Devils of ASU. As a fan of the Frogs and the Big 12, it is in my best interest to be a fan of the Sooners, Red Raiders, and every other Big 12 team…until the play the Horned Frogs.Big 12



The views presented above are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of DoD or its components.


© Copyright 2017 M.C.Wingate. All Rights Reserved.

Thank you, Coach Friedli.

It is a challenge to accurately capture a tribute fitting for someone who meant so much to so many people. A legend in high school football, Coach Vern Friedli held the title of the winningest coach in Arizona high school football until last season. But Coach Friedli’s impact extends far beyond the 331 wins, including 288 in 36 years of coaching at Amphitheater High School.

Yesterday, a flood of memories came back as I attended his “Celebration of Life” at the Amphi basketball arena in Tucson, Arizona. Just a glimpse of his impact was present in the crowd of more than 500 former players, friends, family members, and administrators. I remembered the first time I met Coach Friedli in the summer of 1997. Walking into the football weight room under the stadium, I took a left and saw Coach sitting at his desk. I walked up to him and introduced myself as he stood to shake hands. He was all of 5’8” 165-ish lbs, fit, confident, with kind eyes. He was smaller than I expected but you wouldn’t know it when you talked to him. His fiery personality and impact would soon extend further and higher than his physical stature ever could.

During that first meeting, we sat down and discussed why I transferred to Amphi and wanted to play for the Panthers. Having attended Palo Verde Christian (PVC) for two years, I felt led to take the leap to public school to reach the lost. I wanted my life and my words to lead people to Christ. I also wanted to play football for the best. Coach Friedli and his Panthers were the best in Tucson and everyone knew it. Surprised yet un-phased by my words, Coach welcomed me to the team and gave me a blank 3×5 card. He told me to take it home and write down my personal and team goals for the upcoming year and bring it back to him. Coach Friedli ensured goals were a foundation of the culture of his program and his players.

Coach Friedli 97

I would go on to play and start for Coach Friedli for two seasons. As huge underdogs my first year, we’d fall just short of the 1997 5A Arizona State Championship to Mesa Mountain View 28-24. Their team was led by future NFL hall of fame tight end, Todd Heap. Our scrappy, hard-nosed, wishbone-running team had the game locked up until an erroneous game-changing fumble by Mountain View, inaccurately ruled down after the whistle, and a later failed 4th and 1. We gave relentless effort and fought to the end-as his teams always did.

He’s the coach that got through to me-as only a coach could. One day I wanted to be rebellious and dye my hair with hydrogen peroxide, without my parent’s approval. I’ll never forget showing up for football practice that day with an orange-ish/yellow hair color and hearing Coach yell before I even set foot on the field to stretch, “Wingate, it looks like a horse pissed on your head.” He was right. He never hesitated to be direct, yet honest in his approach to get through to his players.

Towards the end of my senior year, after my parents, coach was the first to encourage and support my goal of attending Texas Christian University (TCU) as a walk-on for the Horned Frogs.  As a contributor to my high school team, hardly a star, this seemed like a lofty goal. Yet, Coach Friedli did not hesitate to extend his support. I watched the Frogs upset the Carson Palmer-led Trojans in the Sun Bowl, and felt like the Frogs had grit, ran the ball and fought just like a Friedli team.  Vern would coach me in the off-season prior to my departure to Fort Worth in preparation for my redshirt freshman season at TCU. When I left and told him thank you, he simply said, “Make your mother proud.”

That day in the weight room he told me about a coach he ran into from PVC at the airport shortly after I’d transferred to Amphi. That coach told him, “You know, Wingate will never play for you. He’s not that good.” Coach laughed with pride and a tone of confidence as only Coach could as he said, “Well, you showed him!” Again, Coach saw something in me I didn’t even see in myself. He believed in all of us, each one of his players.

He believed in hard work. He valued discipline. He modeled integrity. He demanded relentless effort. He cared for his players and wanted them to “make their mother proud.” He fought for those who couldn’t fight for themselves. He valued the team more than the individual yet somehow let each individual know he cared.  He gave his all to develop young men of character. He called out the best in each of us.

Coach taught me to never be satisfied with the status quo. He taught me to fight until I hit a brick wall then go around it, over it or through it. Coach taught me to scrap and fight for what’s right, that’s what his teams did. Ask Todd Heap and the 1997 Mesa Mountain View Toros. I’m sure they remember.

Leaving Coach Friedli’s Celebration of Life yesterday reminded me of the value of leaving a legacy. It reminded me of the fragility of life and making the most of our time here on earth and the greatest impact possible. Coach’s legacy extended far beyond the win column; his legacy was in that basketball arena on the Amphi campus. His legacy is leaders in business, the military, teaching, family, and life. Just as we held up four fingers signifying the last quarter of the game and the importance of finishing strong, his legacy is leaders that do not know how to quit.

At the end of the ceremony, his youngest son, Ted, called all the former players to the arena floor. Hundreds took a knee to say one final prayer with a video recording of Coach praying in the background as he did with us before every football game. That day he planted a seed in the hearts of all the men and women present one more time:

Let’s pray. Pray in your own way. Pray not to win, God willing we shall. We pray that you give a great effort tonight. Thank God He allowed you to play football for Amphi High School. And we thank God that he allowed us to coach you. Good luck, God bless, and we love you. Amen.


That prayer had much more depth than I ever realized as a high school kid. That prayer spoke to the importance of unity of purpose and discipline. It spoke to his vision. It spoke to the value of diversity. It spoke to sportsmanship. It spoke to discipline. It spoke to relentless effort.

It spoke to gratitude for opportunities and the value of seasons. It spoke to Coach’s humble heart and his stewardship of the awesome responsibility of shaping young men in unity, purpose, discipline, vision, diversity, sportsmanship, effort, and respect to the Creator.

Coach called out the leader in me. I take his lessons with me today as a professional Soldier. Coach is greatly responsible for my drive and relentless effort as an Army Officer. After my third deployment, this time to Afghanistan, I visited Coach and his wife, Sharon, to present them with a certificate of appreciation and a flag we flew on a mission during Operation Enduring Freedom as a thank you for his tremendous impact on my life.Coach Friedli Flag

A flag cannot adequately thank a man whose impact goes on long after he is gone. Words cannot adequately express gratitude to a man who put just as much, if not more, effort into building men than he did earning the 331 Wins in his coaching career. You don’t reach that mark without reaching hearts. 

Yesterday’s celebration reminded me of how grateful I was to know and play for a legend. It reminded me how honored I was to see the values instilled by my parents magnified and reinforced as only Coach could. Yesterday, I was reminded of the value of a season and the impact of one man and his teammate, Sharon. Spouses in the coaching profession and military do not necessarily get enough credit for their sacrifice in the shadows.

In Sharon’s case, she was out front standing beside him, supporting and investing in those young student-athletes just the same. However, the sacrifice she made to support and lift him up throughout his stellar career behind the scenes can hardly be quantified by anyone other than his family. The pictures playing on the screen at yesterday’s celebration of life showed Coach valued and invested in his family just as much if not more than his players. The love, respect, and admiration by his children in their speeches about their father were clearly evident.

Thank you, Coach. Thank you for your relentless effort and commitment to the players. Thank you for building men. Thank you for instilling the importance of fight no matter what your size. You may have been one of the shortest men in the room, but you were a giant. Although you are no longer here with us, your investment will continue yielding returns for years to come.

If you missed his Celebration of Life, check it out here: https://www.facebook.com/kvoa4/videos/1642400062459331/?hc_ref=ARSwWDssZcW_BEwvrquFy6BzMkBk3JdKoubcdVdJQg9yB25qm5EkuLBEsimKZ6VWhuY&pnref=story

To anyone reading this, what memories do you have of Coach that others might not know or might not remember? Leave a comment below as we honor his legacy.Coach Friedli


The views presented above are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of DoD or its components.

© Copyright 2017 M.C.Wingate. All Rights Reserved.


Be present. 

Bruce Arians, head coach of the Arizona Cardinals was recently quoted as saying to Alex Marvez and Geoff Schwartz on the SiriusXM Blitz, “For our coaches, I tell them, if you miss a recital or a football game or a basketball game, I’ll fire you. You can always come back and work. Those kids are not going to be there forever. They’re going to grow up and be gone.”

As a former intercollegiate athlete at TCU and current Army Officer, I’ve always seen the parallels between the work ethic of coaching and the military. As a relatively new father with an 18 month old daughter and son due in September, my responsibility as a husband and father has never been more evident and it is the greatest responsibility with which I’ve been entrusted. This responsibility is something some fathers in both professions miss. 

There are seasons and events we never want to miss. In the Army, in coaching sports, sometimes mission or the season dictates otherwise. That means we have a responsibility to make the most of the time we do have with our family while being present for what we can be present for, controlling what we can control with an adequate work-life balance. Quality time does not necessarily mean quantity time. 

Adequate work-life balance is essential to a healthy home and our role as husbands and fathers. In the Army, when our nation calls, we answer. However, above all else our God-given job is to lead our family first whether at home or abroad. If we do it right, the family will be there long after the Army is gone or the coaching career ends. 

Readiness is the #1 priority of our Army’s senior leaders. Too often we give lip-service to the concept of supporting the family while not truly walking it out. I truly believe support from your significant other through those challenging seasons we can’t control is essential to building readiness. If a Soldier knows they have the support of their spouse back home when deployed or at training, it helps foster a healthy culture where the Soldier knows they can focus on the mission we have been called to do. 

It is my responsibility to be present when home, to turn off my phone when able, and not check email when I could be playing with my daughter or talking to my wife about her day. Investing in my daughter and pursuing her heart is essential to her development and her perception of what a Godly man looks like. That image is also directly related to how well I pursue the heart of my wife.  That requires me to give her my undivided attention when I’m able. There are seasons it is not always possible in person. But when it is, fathers, leaders, coaches, we must be present. 

Kaepenick’s message lost due to ill-timed protest

Colin Kaepernick made a bold statement by sitting during the national anthem in protest to ongoing social and racial issues in our country. His actions enraged and continue to enrage many people in this country. In his post-game interview, Kaepernick said he is “not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color.” He later adjusted his protest from sitting to kneeling during the national anthem to donating $1 million to charities that help communities in need due partially to a candid conversation and dialogue with Nate Boyer, a former Green Beret and Seattle Seahawk. kaepernick1He vowed to not stand during the anthem until he is “proud of his nation once more.” As a result a few other athletes have joined in the non-violent protest while simultaneously enraging patriotic people in our country. Nate Boyer did his part to ensure Kaepernick’s message wasn’t completely lost due to an inflammatory action that represents our nation. Yet the fact that Kaepernick donated $1 million this year to charities that help communities is partially clouded by the fact that he takes a knee during the national anthem, a symbol with deep passion for many.

At the end of the day, does his protest help affect positive change? Do his actions help heal race relations in our country or further damage them by feeding into an already existing racial prejudice and in our country? What are these 17+ athletes providing as a potential fix to the problem affecting our nation?

Although I understand the intent of Kaepernick’s message, his actions do very little to highlight the oppression of black people in our country. However, his and the other protesters’ actions distract from the message they are trying to relay by timing it during the national anthem. We have a saying while making decisions when analyzing missions and planning for future events: What is the second and third-order effect of a decision? How will this decision affect what we are trying to accomplish? In part, it appears Kaepernick’s actions are furthering the gap of division in our country rather than healing the racial and social injustice he’s hoping to highlight.

No one can or should deny Kaepernick’s constitutional right to protest the way he is. That’s part of what makes our country great. However, if exercising your constitutional right has the consequence of furthering the divide you are attempting to bridge, I offer the actions are short sighted and distract us from the true problem. screen-shot-2016-09-01-at-9-15-46-amIf you want to change the way rogue police officers treat a segment of our society, wearing socks with cartoon police officer pigs is probably not the best way. These actions continue to fuel hate and disrespects police officers, the majority of whom protect and serve with distinct honor and selflessness. There are rogue and ill-intended people in every profession. However there are many, many more who are doing the right thing to support and defend us all.
Take Officer Joshua Scaglione, a Detroit, Michigan police officer who after pulling over LaVonte Dell for his windows being too dark in April this year, noticed Mr. Dell’s three year old daughter without a car seat. After asking why his daughter was not in a car seat, Mr. Dell explained his financial challenges and personal struggles. Rather than igniting a disrespectful interchange and making matters worse, Dell was honest, open, and genuine. As a result, instead of giving him a ticket and making Officer Scaglione asked Mr. Dell to follow him to Wal-Mart. When they arrived, the Officer took him inside and purchased him a pink car seat, Dell’s daughter’s favorite color. Scaglione asked for nothing in return. He related to and empathized with Mr. Dell’s challenges. As a result of his random act of kindness, he earned the respect of Mr. Dell by providing a solution to his fellow man’s problem.

This had nothing to do with race. Rather, this had everything to do with loving others. I wonder how Officer Scaglione, an honorable man feels when seeing a professional athlete like Kaepernick wearing socks that disrespect and detract from the good things some police officers do. The media and people in our nation have responded talked for weeks about the protest rather than the message they are trying to relay.

If we do want to change social and racial injustice, what is the best way to accomplish the end goal? When counseling my junior officers, I often tell them, “Don’t bring a problem without a potential solution.” If they do that, it shows me they have thought about the problem, analyzed the problem, and came up with possible solutions. It’s part of their essential development as an officer. I don’t want to always give them the answers to the question without knowing they have exhausted their own resources or experience to come up with an answer. Otherwise, the junior leader will expect the easy way out or a handout every time. That does not build critical-thinking, creative, and determined officers. We want officers that relentlessly pursue solutions to complex problems. When they hit a brick wall with their solution, I want them to find a way around, over, or through that wall to accomplish the mission. If the goals of the protests are to change social and racial injustice, are they identifying the symptom or the disease?

When medics and doctors treat diseases, they identify the symptoms one by one and provide a potential treatment. If we truly want to change racial injustice, oppression, corruption in politics, we must do our own individual part to first be the change we are looking for, rather than just making a controversial, inflammatory action. 1916100_1284618481385_449511_nAs a white, middle class male, I will never know what it is like to deal with the challenges of some blacks in our country. However in order to truly treat the disease, each one of us has to do our individual part to be part of the change we are hoping to accomplish. Often times when we say, “it’s them,” that’s the problem, we fail to realize, we are not doing our own part to be part of the positive change we are trying to achieve. This change begins with each and every one of us.

Part of the problem in our nation is not solely oppression of black people or racism. Those are simply the symptoms of a greater disease. The disease of oppression, racism, social injustice, and ultimately sin is in the heart of man. Actions like Kaepernick’s only further the symptoms rather than heal the underlying disease. The ignorant San Francisco 49ers fan that burned Kaepernick’s jersey and called him a dumb n-word did nothing but show his own ignorance and racial prejudice rather than positively addressing the underlying issue as Nate Boyer did with his open letter to Kaepernick. That 49er fan made the symptom worse. Nate Boyer helped bridge the gap and did his part to treat the disease.

Kaepernick and other protesters think they are doing their part take a stance for  a real issue in our country. If nothing else, Kaepernick’s actions have ignited a conversation. But has he or any of the other protesters stopped to think about whether or not their message is getting lost in their method protest rather than actually affecting positive social change? I do believe he has the best intentions. He should be using his platform as an athlete to be the change. However, his method for doing it could be better approached by not spotlighting himself while simultaneously taking focus away from his team and distracting from an event that is about much more than the individual.


The Denver Broncos players and anyone else that take a knee, sit or stand daydreaming into the distance during the national anthem are just as wrong as Kaepernick. I have not seen anyone burn Jared Crick (93), Billy Winn (97), and Adam Gotsis (99) for their disrespect. I see three different races equally disrespecting a solemn symbol for our nation at a time that is sacred and stirs many feelings, memories, and emotions for me and many others that have fought in our nation’s wars. Yet, the media doesn’t call them to the carpet for their slightly less-blatant disrespect.

The national anthem is a moment of unity and remembrance for me no matter what our beliefs. It is a moment to celebrate how far we’ve come. It is a moment to think of all the brothers in arms I’ve gone to war with, some of which were lost defending our country. It doesn’t say we’ve made it. It doesn’t deny there are dark moments in our history. Yet, we are where we are as a nation partially due to the adversity we have worked so hard together to never do again.

Protesting in the middle of something that means so much to so many people points the spotlight directly on the individual what we haven’t done, rather than celebrating what we have done and what we as a nation have fought through for over 238 years. We have fought to be by the people and for the people. We have fought to be unified under a symbol, a flag that represents all colors, creeds, and nationalities. The flag represents those who are here and live in those very freedoms. It also represents those who have fought and died for our freedom. It is a symbol not just for all of us, but of all of us.


The flag and the national anthem do not represent perfection. Our nation’s history is anything but perfect. Even now, years after civil rights and now the first Black President in our history, our nation is not perfect and never will be. However, our ideals, our fight, our never quit, never-say-never grit is what made us leave tyranny to start our own nation in the first place. The flag doesn’t deny racism still exists in the heart of some.  It doesn’t deny there are issues. Rather, it represents what we should be and still can be. But it begins with me. It begins with you. It begins with we the people.  For we the people have to be the change before the radicals, the bigots, the dissenters, the racists, the haters, the homophobes, xenophobes, baskets of deplorables, and hate-filled Americans will change their actions and return to part of what makes this nation great: our diversity and unity of purpose.

Change begins with each of us. It begins with us not just pointing out the problem, rather coming together to come up with viable, achievable solutions to problems that affect our nation. Maybe then and only then will the true message we are trying to achieve not be drowned out be ill-timed protests.  Kaepernick ignited a conversation but the conversation is not even about the message he and the other protesters are trying to convey. I remember my football coaches saying, “You play on Saturdays like you practice during the week.” I wonder if we start practicing pointing out the good things people do rather than the negative, could we ignite a fire of change we really hope to accomplish in our society?



The views presented above are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of DoD or its components.

© Copyright 2016 M.C.Wingate. All Rights Reserved.






God’s Perfect Will

“Delight yourself in the Lord; And He will give you the desires of your heart.” (Proverbs 37:4, NASB)

As I returned from my third deployment in the fall of 2014, I knew I would be moving to Texas to take command of the legendary DUSTOFF unit of the 1st Cavalry Division, C/2-227 AVN REGT, formerly the 571st MED CO. What I did not know was what was next for Danielle and I. As I boarded the plane from Mihail Kogalniceanu, Romania to start our final two legs home to Fort Campbell, Kentucky, I was excited to see what God had in store for us. What I only knew intuitively was how quick things would develop with her if I 10609696_10202773514314646_6274065620132661299_nwould just trust Him. When I saw her after walking in that hangar after 9 months, I felt joy and excitement. However, it was not until after a week together in Panama City and Destin I finally admitted what I knew in my spirit for the last year of “dating” 7000 miles away from each other: This was it. She was my lifelong teammate.

Now, returning home in just over a month, I return to a loving, gorgeous wife and beautiful daughter. There is no uneasiness. There is no question of her faithfulness. There is no question if she missed me. There is no question if she wants me home. I know this. I know this by her words and her actions. I know this because our marriage is centered on the Cross. I know this because I finally surrendered my life to His will rather than trying to do it on my own. As a result, I don’t find my joy and happiness in my wife. My happiness is found in obedience to Christ and supplemented by walking in His will. Finding happiness in a person will never end well. People are imperfect. He is perfect. We are not.

So why do I say all of this? I see posts on facebook and have conversations with friends who are in a relationship and finding their happiness in their significant other. They found the one! Look, if there was THE ONE, someone screwed it up for us a long time ago. There is someone God has made to complement each of us. But our happiness cannot be wrapped up in solely that person. It’s a fine line. We should be happy with the person. But if we find happiness in that person, our emotions in that moment will ebb and flow with the inevitable good and bad days of our relationship. If our happiness hinges on finding that person, we are going to be sorely disappointed. People will let you down. Christ will not. When we are rooted in HIM first, He will lead you to His perfect will.

One of my friends from Nashville, Morgann McClanahan-David, has a song called, Perfect Will, which is available for download on iTunes and Spotify. J Although my interaction with her and her husband had been relatively minimal, the impact of her song left a lasting impression. I saw her and her husband perform at an album release in Nashville at a time I was in the lowest valley of my life. I was coming off a horrible relationship and searching for God’s perfect will for my life while longing to find the desire of my heart: the wife God had for me. I knew his timing was close, but did not know how to get there. I heard Morgann’s song and it made me smile, pause and think, “Why am I trying to do this my way? My way hasn’t worked out so well to this point.”

003C898A-4379-4EBD-B2BF-92D81E3D5785.JPGIn that moment, sitting in a chair at the Anchor Fellowship in Nashville, Tennessee, I finally committed to patiently waiting for HIS perfect will to be revealed. The chorus of her song says, “I can’t stop smiling…grey skies, blue skies, my sun’s shining when I’m in your perfect will.” God’s perfect will led me to my bride. Not my will, not my path, Not my way. Your way; Your will.

As a result of His perfect will, I have an amazing, gorgeous wife, a beautiful daughter. These were desires of my heart. I sought Him never wonder if I’m in His will. I never wonder if there is something better.

I leave my single friends and readers of this post with three bullets of advice:

  1. Be patient and trust His perfect will is best. Patience isn’t always easy. When you see all your friends around you getting married, don’t worry. He’s either preparing your significant other for you or preparing you for your significant other. He won’t let you down. When we try to do it on our own or create our own path for happiness, it will only lead to short-term fulfillment or worse, a valley of disappointment and despair. His perfect will leads us to a lifetime of true joy and the desires of our heart.
  2. If you wonder if there is something better, there probably is. With both of my previous marriages, I wondered if there was something better. It was a drain, every day. It was miserable more days than not. Why it took me to walk that long road to figure it out is for a whole other post. But know this: You will never wonder if there is something better when you are walking in His will. There will be good and bad days and a healthy relationship and marriage takes effort from both people. But you will never wonder if you should be with someone else. You will know this is exactly what God has for you.
  3. You will know when it is the right person and there will be no question. If there is any part of you that feels hesitation in the relationship you are in, there is a good chance it isn’t His perfect will. Prior to meeting Danielle, I wrote a non-negotiable list of everything I wanted in a wife. I wrote this list when I was fifteen too, but for some reason I compromised that list and lost it. Side note: never lose your list.

I committed to not settling for any less than that list and Danielle met every requirement and many more I never even realized I needed. Deep down, God has placed what you need in a partner on your heart. Write down those desires and don’t settle for any less than God’s perfect will. You’re not too picky and it’s not too much to ask. He or She is out there. Just. Be. Patient. Surrender to Him. He will give you the desires of your heart.




The views presented above are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of DoD or its components.

© Copyright 2016 M.C.Wingate. All Rights Reserved.

Photo Credit for last picture to Heather Zak of Heather Zak Designs. http://www.heatherzakdesigns.com/

Never Give Up.

If you’re a college football fan, by now, you either saw or heard about TCU’s dramatic come from behind victory over the Oregon Ducks in this year’s Valero Alamo Bowl. Most have considered the Alamo Bowl to be the highlight of an otherwise disappointing bowl season. TCU’s victory over Oregon finished with a crescendo, ultimately providing encouragement for anyone that has ever wanted to overcome the odds to finish strong in football or in life.

This season began on a high note for a TCU team that fell just short of lofty expectations and a Big 12 title due to multiple key injuries. Many of us fans would say this season did not go as planned. But the victory for the Frogs is a storybook finish for a resilient team who put the weight of their season on the shoulders of a backup QB in his first start. A QB who was thrust into the spotlight two days before his final game in a Horned Frog uniform due to one bad choice made worse by a star QB. The outcome of the game is not a surprise to those of those of us who love and follow TCU. This season ends as one of the finest of Head Coach Gary Patterson’s coaching career so far.

Despite the injuries and disappointments in Stillwater and Norman in November and on the River Walk a few nights before the Alamo Bowl, this season ends as one none of the players, coaches or fans will soon forget. The storyline of TCU’s 2015 season and come back finish in the final game of the year is ripe with depth and pregnant with encouragement for anyone who has ever had a season that didn’t go exactly as planned. The storyline of TCU’s final game and come-from-behind victory provides many points of encouragement to anyone that has had disappointments and setbacks in their life.

Don’t be overwhelmed by the odds; overcome them. Down 31-0 at half TCU’s win-probability bottomed out at 0.9% (courtesy ESPN Stats & Info). Adjusting their plan, and committing to the cause, TCU overcame the odds rather than be overwhelmed by them.

ProbabilityWho has faced overwhelming odds? Who has ever been overcome with depression, sadness, and disappointment? Who has ever felt at the end of his or her rope? Who has been counted out by everyone only to ultimately overcome the odds to victory?

Our thinking can change our outcome. What went on in the locker room at halftime of the Alamo Bowl in the purple locker room? The coaches made adjustments (to the game and the clothing), and coached up the players. Things don’t always go as we plan. Sometimes adjustments are required. That begins with our thinking. The coaches and players prepared their minds to take it one play at a time, one series at a time. They could’ve focused on the score at half; rather they focused on the goal. Eventually, they achieved what they believed: we can win this game. Who needs a coach to help you through? Who needs to make adjustments at the intermission of their life in order to finish strong and change your outcome? It begins with our thinking.

Never give up. Down by 31 points and all but considered out, the Horned Frogs could have quit. When TCU lost over 20 starters throughout the course of the season, TCU could have quit. When TCU’s All-American receiver was ruled out for the game against Oregon, TCU could have quit. When TCU’s Heisman candidate QB snuck out past curfew resulting in his eventual arrest and suspension from the game, TCU could have quit. Down 31-0 at the half, TCU could have quit. But the Frogs were not finished yet. As most now know, TCU would eventually come back to match the largest comeback in bowl history. Outscoring the Ducks 47-10 in the second half and OTs, TCU went on to defeat the Oregon Ducks 47-41 in 3 OTs behind the arm and legs of a 5th year backup QB and a team that committed to overcome the odds, change their outcome through their thinking, and never quit. Will you?



 The views presented above are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of DoD or its components.

© Copyright 2016 MCWingate. All Rights Reserved.